Saturday, April 2, 2016

Blogville Mayoral Eleckshun


Hey y'all!  Late last nite, I saw somefin interestin - nominayshuns are bein eggcepted for da next Blogville Mayor.  And dis got me thinkin, maybe I should run.  Da peeps round here has been watchin da eleckshun news a lot and I figgered I could definitely win since I's been learnin all da pawlitical tricks.

I's got da whole #GirlPower thing going on like Hillary.
I's got da crazy white hair like Bernie.
I went to da Hahvahd School of Law and Barkins like Teddy.
I got da big ears like Marco.
And I's rich like da Donald.  I mean, has ya seen how many toys I gots?  And all my dresses.  Yeah, I's really really rich.  Maybe not gold-plated toilet level, but I does have a pink princess crate.  And I know how to use Twitter.  And I's not afraid of a fight.  Punchin some protestors, or gettin my campaign manager to (I are lookin at you momma, I know ya has punched a bitch for me before) ain't gonna be no problem.

So then I started thinkin bout my platform.  And nope, I ain't talkin bout heels.  Furst, I think I need to MAKE BLOGVILLE GRATE AGAIN.


I mean, I think we can all agree dat we like cheeze.  And if da hoomans had to grate da cheeze, think of how much more would be likely to hit da ground.  And we all know dat we get ground cheeze, well, unless your momma has kwik refleckses and low cleanliness standards (yeah, I is lookin at you momma!)

I also think we needs to build a wall to keep our mommas and daddies off of da big book of faces.  Some of them go over there and think dey should stop bein our secremataries.  So we is gonna build a great big beeyootifull wall, and da peeps are gonna luv it.  And not only are dey gonna luv it, dey are gonna PAY for it.  And not outta da treat budget either.  And if dey complain, BOOM! dat wall are gettin 87 feet higher.

And I want to take dis time to address some roomers bout me and cats.  Us terrierists ain't known for bein cat friendly, but I has had many cats work for me, and I can tell you, they LUV me.


See, I are pretty shure I are gonna win da cat vote.  Dat's what all da Poles are sayin, and I's never known Poles to lie.  Get conquered by Nazis and Rushins, yeah, but not lie.

Wait momma, what?  In order to run we are sposed to help organize a Blogville Summer Olympics?  I shoulda based my cam-pain on 2012's Republican guy, not dis years???  

Oh well, I guess I'll just have to settle for bein really really rich and leave da pawlitical stuff to some udder pup.  Maybe one wif magical underwears.  I mean, I don't wanna have to start wearin pantsuits instead of pretty dresses.  And momma are warning me dat bein my Chief of Staff might cut into dress-makin time, and NOPE, dat one are not happenin.  So I'll just be Princess Whitley, bein a princess sounds more fun dan bein a mayor anyways.  Da clothes has got to be better.

52 comments:

  1. Make Blogville GRATE again - that's the perfect slogan. I need to go make a yard sign!

    Abby Lab

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    Replies
    1. Just make shure no udder pup marks it.

      Delete
  2. Bahaha I think you'd be great at the job!!

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    Replies
    1. I would be da GRATEST mayor ever and a HUGE success.

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  3. Whitley! You cracked us up with this post!!
    hugs
    Mr Bailey, Hazel & Mabel

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  4. OMD!!!!! LOVES IT!!!! Nows, befores I gives my endorsement, I gots to gets your view on Margarita Monday Madness....yea, or nea??
    Oh, and will there be a burdie landing on your podium?
    These are impawtent questions! hehehehe
    Kisses,
    Ruby ♥

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    Replies
    1. Margarita Monday, Margarita Tuesday, Margarita Wednesday, well, ya gets da idea. And not only would dere be margaritas everyday, but dey would be HUGE BEEYOOTIFULL margaritas.

      And if dere are a burdie landin on my podium, I's barkin it. Unless it are chikken or turkey. Den I's eatin it.

      Delete
  5. Yeah, but your bootie collection is poor compared to Imelda Marcos.

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  6. BOL....Make America grate again...teeheehee.
    Smileys!
    Dory, Jakey, Arty & Bilbo

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  7. Cheese in any form gets my vote.
    Grate post Whitley.
    Toodle pip!
    Bertie.

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  8. Oh I luffs cheese!!!! AND you posh dresses!!!!
    Loves and licky kisses
    Princess Leah xxx

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  9. You would have made a wonderful mayoress, Whitley!

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  10. we think you would make a pawsome Mayoress

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  11. I love your post... yay for girl-power and yay for making blogville to a grate place!!!

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  12. WE Love that Slogan.... Make Blogville GRATE !! And we think that you would make a Grate Mayoress....
    Butt wonder about the MAGICAL Underwear... We DO have our beloved Tighty Whiteies you know... Butt we didn't think they were MAGICAL...

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  13. You would make a pawsome mayor. We hope you run!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmm, it does seem like my public are demandin me.

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  14. Oh Whitley, I do believe that your Chief of Staff would be able to handle your Mayoral dress makin duties as well as some other duties all at the same time. It is why the peeps were given 2 hands - I mean, duh! You would be a pawesome Mayor and I would vote for you in a heartbeat. #TerrierNation

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  15. We think you would make a great Mayor of Blogville but understand how you wouldn't want to take too much of your mom's time with it. We wouldn't want Blogville duties to get in the way of making new dresses for you.

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  16. Let us know if you decide to throw your collar in the ring! And now that we think about it, maybe you need to give Hillary some fashion advice. Just sayin' . . .

    Murphy & Stanley
    Mayorz of All Paws

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  17. Wow! You're a perfect candidate! Hooray!

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  18. Hi Y'all!

    You have my vote! That is right up until you decided to remain a princess...which is fine too.

    Y'all come on by,
    Hawk aka BrownDog

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    Replies
    1. Yeah, princesses gots it even better. Dat are why my momma wants to #MarryHarry.

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  19. Let us know how we can help campaign for you!

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    Replies
    1. Send a bajillion dollars to Whitley Westie, it are my new Super PAC. For treats, uhhhh, I means camp-pain eggspenses.

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  20. Whitley, you'd make a wonderful mayor - and a very pretty one, too!

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  21. OMD OMC our Mama was laughin so hard at your post. You would make the pawfect Mayor Whitley!!!

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  22. Me and Nellie think you would make a great Mayor of Blogville. Go for it!!

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  23. Replies
    1. Yeah, can ya believe peeps wore dose things?

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  24. I think that's a great idea, and I didn't realize it was election time again! I would vote for you!

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  25. Whoot! I would vote you in right now, cause me too loves cheese, grated or not, BOL!

    And um...you could be a mayoress and decree that all the lady furs shluld from hence furth be princesses with all kinds of dresses and pink carriers, etc:)


    And just give all the men-furs a good bone or two...that always helps me to be agreeable:)

    And you know...growlmy just bought a couple of those preshredded bags...but she does spill a lot even from those, BOL! Guess who does cleanup patrol?

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    Replies
    1. Lucky. My momma just eats what she spills off da floor.

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  26. If ya changes yer mind and decides to run, I wanna be hed of yer securitee-- I's already got da tshirt... and I's quik at takin' down introoders... 'specially if'n dey's of da varmint varyeatee...

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    Replies
    1. Of course, ya could be head of da secret service. I wouldn't trust any udder pup.

      Delete

Leave me a woof, I'll bark right back atcha!